Pizza Party U.S.A. sign now

Let's begin by stating the obvious: Leap Day should be a holiday. I mean, come on: that pretty much goes without saying. It's not even a real day. It's like some kind of extra-dimensional day from the Phantom Zone that only phases into Earth Prime every four years. It's a 100-percent free 24 hours, and employers should have no claim to it. Getting stuck working on February 29th is like finding five bucks on a playground and having it immediately expropriated by a passing bully.

Okay, sure, 2/29 is a Sunday this year -- you've got me there. But that won't always be the case: Sooner or later it's going to fall on a weekday, I think. Maybe not. I don't really feel like doing the math. But in any case -- and in keeping with America's new doctrine of preemption -- the time to act is now. It's like Bush said in the 2003 State of the Union address: "We cannot wait on events while dangers gather. We will not stand by, as peril draws closer and closer. The United States of America will not permit the world's [coolest day] to threaten us with [the possibility of getting stuck working]."

That's why we need to turn Leap Day into a holiday this year. But Leap Day shouldn't be just another run-of-the-mill three-day weekend. After all, we already have a ridiculous amount of winter holidays: Thanksgiving, the freebie day after Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's Day, Martin Luther King Jr. Day, some holiday in February, Arbor Day or something -- Christ, I can't even keep track of 'em all. So, look: We've got our fill of those.

And besides, Leap Day only comes once every four years. Surely that calls for something special, something that will give Americans 1,460 days of giddy anticipation between occurrences. We need something extraordinary, a quadrennial celebration like none the world has ever seen.

Ladies and gentlemen, what America needs is Pizza Party U.S.A.

Read the full Pizza Party U.S.A. proposal

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Goal reached !
1000 / 1000

Latest Signatures

  • 15 February 20161000. Joe S
    But what city's style? I say Chicago Preferred toppings chicken, bacon, diced tomato and red pepper Will not eat mushrooms or black olives
  • 11 February 2016999. Roy D
    I support this petition
  • 08 February 2016998. Aaron R
    My only request: Can it be at the neighborhood roller-rink? Preferred toppings Pepperoni, Jalapenos, and the sweetest tasting Ranch in all the land. Will not eat Other men.
  • 07 February 2016997. Ashley Whitehead
    YEAH PIZZA PARTY!! Preferred toppings cheese, pineapple, and veggies! Will not eat olives or any meat
  • 03 February 2016996. Steven C
    I support this petition
  • 02 February 2016995. Zachw Odom
    can i bring a movie, too? Preferred toppings mushrooms, banana peppers, onions Will not eat sausage
  • 01 February 2016994. Jason Gill
    I support this petition
  • 25 January 2016993. Vanessa N
    I support this petition
  • 23 January 2016992. Bl Good
    YEA Preferred toppings pepperoni Will not eat mushrooms
  • 22 January 2016991. Victoria F
    I support this petition
  • 21 January 2016990. Jesse M
    Taste the sweet Pizza of freedom! Preferred toppings Chipmunk Will not eat Human flesh
  • 19 January 2016989. Patti Farrell
    Great Idea! Preferred toppings Basil & Procutto Will not eat Anchovies
  • 17 January 2016988. Austin A
    Yeearrghhh!! Preferred toppings Chicken // Black Olive Will not eat Mushrooms, Anchovies
  • 14 January 2016987. Stan H
    this here is a real good idear Preferred toppings pork Will not eat that fish crap
  • 13 January 2016986. Rachel D
    I support this petition
  • 12 January 2016985. Kelly R
    F'n sweet dude Preferred toppings pepperoni Will not eat ONIONS
  • 12 January 2016984. Tom C
    Pizza rules all. Preferred toppings Cocks Will not eat anchovies
  • 08 January 2016983. Laurie J
    Bring it on! Preferred toppings Cheese, Cheese and more cheese
  • 29 December 2015982. Peter F
    Sounds amazing Preferred toppings Ham & pineapple Will not eat capers
  • 28 December 2015981. Amy Mclean
    I support this petition
  • 21 December 2015980. Dan B
    hell yea Preferred toppings mushrooms, green peppers, mozz
  • 19 December 2015979. Todd O
    Pizza Party USA is the greatest idea ever Preferred toppings Pepperoni, black olives Will not eat anchovies, italian sausage
  • 14 December 2015978. Patrick O
    I support this petition
  • 30 November 2015977. Jamie K
    Yea Pizza! Preferred toppings Pepporoni, Mushrooms, Meatballs, Pineapple, Chicken
  • 25 November 2015976. Tanya W
    I support this petition
  • 24 November 2015975. Brian L
    I support this petition
  • 19 November 2015974. David Mcmahon
    it brings a tear to my eye that someone else things that pizza partys should be national holidays. Preferred toppings pepperoni, mushrooms, sausage Will not eat pinapple, tomatoes

browse all the signatures


Alejandra RobertsonBy:
Petition target:
Whomever Is In Charge Of This Kind Of Stuff


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