Skip Bayless Needs to Go Away sign now

Please...Help Us Make It Stop...

Skip Bayless, criminal douchewhistle. Its been well documented that hes the most annoying androgynous talking head in the history of the televised medium. His commentary is vapid, his opinions are worthless, and his mock turtlenecks are offensive to anyone with even the slightest sartorial sensibilities. He has no real perspective or opinionhe simply identifies what the general consensus is on the topics du jour and then loudly, baselessly and effeminately advocates the exact opposite perspective with the impetuousness of a Long Island housewife insisting on the sale price on a designer-imposter handbag. He adds no value to any production that's contaminated with his presence and he is chronically sensationalistic, misinformed and nauseating. He offends all five senses (Yes, we can smell his rancid idiocy all the way from Bristol.)

We, like most of America, want him off of of our televisions. We want him off Sportscenter. We want him off of the putridity that is ESPNs First Take with Jay Crawford, He-Man and, I believe, Isaac from the Love Boat [TJ Addition: Eric Kuselias, sometime stand-in for that serial groper Crawford, looks like the Hulk]. We want him gone. And we're thinking that you do too.

In this light, we have a proposal, and were determined to take it one step further than your pedestrian, run of the mill Fire (this is meant to disparage all such sites with the exception of, which is good, though Im told full of shit.) We are convinced that the rest of America hates Skip Bayless so much, that they are willing to put their collective monies where their collective mouths are.

In the hopes of ridding the airwaves and the WorldWideLeader of Bayless, we are willing to each purchase a 6 month (26 issues) subscription to ESPN the Magazine, immediately upon the firing of Skip Bayless. That comes to a cost of $26.00. And we believe that we are not alone. We think that at least 100,000 others are willing to make this same pledge. You hear that Bodenheimer? You ready to draft a "This is why we canned Bayless" memo Norby? $26 bucks times 100,000? For $2.6 million you could hire five new douchewhistles to scream at Stephen A while Dana Jacobsen tries to subvert her pangs to utter anti-Catholic hate speech in the background.

If you are willing to put your money where your mouth is, sign your name below and pledge that, if and when ESPN removes Bayless from its airwaves, youre committed to 26 (annoyingly oversized) issues of ESPN the Mag.

We can make this happen. Its morning in America. We shall overcome. YES WE CAN. And all that other crap. Our long national nightmare will soon be over...

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Goal reached !
50 / 50

Latest Signatures

  • 11 November 201550. Omar Alis
    Fire Skip Bayless
  • 02 October 201549. Geoff B
    I'll see you in Hell, Bayless....
  • 13 June 201548. Tee Gordon
    I support this petition
  • 19 May 201547. Gheorghe Rios
    Go away Skip
  • 17 April 201546. Jordan M
    I support this petition
  • 26 March 201545. Mark B
    The faculty, alums and students of Vanderbilt cry everytime Skip Bayless speaks. It's almost on-par with the affect George W. Bush has on everyone associated with Yale.
  • 24 March 201544. Johnny B
    I support this petition
  • 05 March 201543. Casey S
    I support this petition
  • 26 January 201542. Richard L
    I support this petition
  • 14 June 201441. Ray Jackson
    Fire SKIP
  • 13 June 201440. Darren W
    Please this amn needs to go away ASAP
  • 16 April 201439. Matt A
    I support this petition
  • 01 February 201438. Frank P
    Remove him he is the worst.
  • 28 October 201337. Malhar N
    I support this petition
  • 13 September 201336. Dustin H
    Skip is the Bill O'Reilly of ESPN. We don't need the word vomit.
  • 26 July 201335. William B
    Skip is a complete tool, whenever he is on the tv my cat gets dry heaves
  • 08 June 201334. Clint A
    His regarding the PSU debacle being overblown, should be his last public take on anything.
  • 07 March 201333. Nick P
    this man shouldnt be on tv
  • 31 January 201332. Jack Harmon
    Skip sucks
  • 09 November 201231. Peter P
    This petition is dumb. You are dumb.
  • 08 October 201230. Brendan W
    Go to hell Bayless
  • 19 August 201229. Jd F
  • 08 August 201228. Tj Holt
    Skip's killed more men than Cecil B. DeMille
  • 16 July 201227. Drew L
    He is a moron
  • 17 June 201226. Gary Hanson
    Man, Skip Bayless sucks
  • 16 April 201225. Robert Booth
    what an idiot. I turn off the TV right away when this DB comes on
  • 20 January 201224. Matt C
    let's fire Colin from Sports Nation while we're at it

browse all the signatures


Sheryl WrightBy:
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